An estimated two million people in the UK are thought to be living with undiagnosed ADHD, and being unlucky in love online could be a tell-tale sign of the condition. In fact researchers found that over a fifth of singletons with ADHD are more likely to be feel overwhelmed by dating apps and three in four ADHD daters report feeling misunderstood using them. In addition, a third of people admitted to struggling with small talk on dating apps.
But now, a team of researchers and behavioural scientists are trying to make it easier for people with ADHD to address these issues.
NHS statistics show more than 230,000 people in England take ADHD meds to combat their inattentiveness and hyperactivity. Prescription rates jumped by a fifth in 2023 — the biggest annual rise since records began in 2015. Research suggests that the increase has largely been fuelled by a rise in women in their 20s and 30s using the apps, although rates are still increasing in children.
ADHD — Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder — is a behavioural condition defined by inattentiveness, hyperactivity and impulsiveness which affects around 5% of children in the US. In the UK, 3.6% of boys and 0.85% of girls suffer from the condition. Symptoms typically appear at an early age and become more noticeable as children grow. Most cases are diagnosed between 6 and 12 years old. Adults can also suffer, but there is less research available.
Symptoms can include:
- Constant fidgeting
- Poor levels of concentration
- Excessive movement or talking
- Acting without thinking
- Being unable to deal with stress
- Having little or no sense of danger
- Making careless mistakes
- Mood swings
- Forgetfulness
- Difficulty organising tasks
- Continually starting new tasks before finishing old ones
- An inability to listen or carry out instructions
ADHD’s exact cause is unclear, but it’s thought to involve genetic mutations that affect a person’s brain function and structure and premature babies and those with epilepsy or brain damage are more at risk.
ADHD is also linked to anxiety, depression, insomnia, Tourette’s and epilepsy. There is no cure, but a combination of medication and therapy can relieve symptoms and make day to-day life easier.
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Researchers examined 9,000 people with an ADHD diagnosis on their experiences with online dating. They found people with ADHD were 22% more likely to feel overwhelmed by dating apps compared to neurotypical daters. Daters with the condition were also 38% more likely to find it difficult to keep conversations going.
Assessing why they felt overwhelmed, 43% confessed they often forgot to respond to matches, who then frequently assumed their slow response meant they were not interested.
31% of ADHD daters were more likely than neurotypical daters to report they didn’t like small talk. Those users might fare better if they were up-front about communication and dating styles. The researchers suggested moving from a digital conversation to an in person date after around three days of chatting.
Approximately half of 18 to 34 year-olds are thought to have used more than the 1,400 dating apps available in the UK, but a recent Forbes survey found that 79% of Gen Z’ers claimed to have experienced ‘burnout’ thanks to online dating.
In March 2024, NHS England announced it would launch a new task force to examine the concerning rise in adults and children being diagnosed with ADHD. Experts warned that rogue private clinics are over-diagnosing ADHD and have questioned the widespread prescribing of powerful stimulant drugs to treat it.
The booming market is thought to have been fuelled by celebrities such as model and plastic surgery addict Katie Price and Love Island star Olivia Atwood talking about their ADHD ordeals, complaining of waits of up to ten years for an assessment on the NHS. Social media sites are also full of users telling how medication helped to calm them down, control their fidgeting and boost their concentration. Earlier this year, one psychologist warned a rise in ADHD awareness had distorted society’s understanding of neurodiversity and what constitutes ‘typical’ behaviour.
Dr Lisa Williams, director of The Autism Service, which operates 29 clinics across England and Wales, said “If we’re not more careful, diagnoses like autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and ADHD are going to be meaningless, with every other person we meet having been labelled as such. The more we broaden and blur what diagnoses like ASD and ADHD look like, the more people will ‘fit’ into the category and the less specialist care is available for people living with a true developmental disability.”
However, experts have also argued that ADHD was only officially listed in the UK as a disorder that affects adults in 2008. Before that, it was regarded as a problem that children grew out of and the result was that rather than being over diagnosed, some experts claim many adults are now being told they have ADHD and that their symptoms had not been recognised as such.